I've been speaking Danish all my life.

Tonight at dinner Richard was teaching me Danish. Raoul kept joking about how we should have a chalkboard installed on the wall because dinner was becoming like a classroom. I was asking Richard how to say everything and then having him repeat it three or four times so I could remember. Plus I have to analyze the Danish grammar, so I can understand it, since I don't have a class.
Anyway I asked Richard how to say "to remember" and he said something that sounded like "whooska" and then I realized he was saying HUSKER. I already knew that DU means YOU and put the two together, husker du. When we were little we loved playing HUSKER DU. It was a memory game, meaning "Do you remember?" in Danish. I had no idea it meant that and I have pronounced HUSKER like corn "husk" my whole life.
oh the joys of childhood.
I learned French from Disney movies and Danish from board games.

København

Saturday morning I woke up singing, "This is not a rat race with winners and losers this is the fast pace way of life" in my friend's apartment in Copenhagen (København in Danish). Friday I went to town to go to the temple and a singles institute activity. They were having an international night where we learned about Nicaragua. There were two girls from Nicaragua there (who live in Denmark) and they made the food and did a presentation. It was so fun, mostly because I got to speak Spanish all night and we planned to hang out some other time. They are so nice and cute.
There were these two guys from Norway and an American girl there. Afterward we just went walking in the street, in search of Dr. Pepper, but without success. Maybe I will go visit Norway?!? I'm not sure, but those guys were talking me into it. I have to see if I can find a cheap airplane ticket.
Then on Saturday I went to the train station in the morning to meet Merja. When she got to town we went walking around looking for second hand shops. We both wanted to buy more warm clothes. Many of the shops were closed, but we turned the corner in this one neighbor and found a little market. There was a whole street filled with garage salers!! I guess it was the neighborhood's party so all the people who lived there brought out their stuff to sell. I found a leather jacket for $8.50 and a sweater and long sleeve shirt for $7 each. Mostly, clothes are expensive here. I haven't wanted to buy anything, so I am sooooo happy about these purchases.
After our success, we went to lunch then to the Danish Design Center and then headed home.
I really love that city. They have bicycle lanes on every street and at some streets the bikers even have their own lights! København is like a fairytale.

five minutes without talking

I am having the time of my life. srsly. Every day is different and the same, relaxing and exciting. But sometimes you really do miss those people with whom it is so natural to go five minutes without talking. You know who you are. love you. thinking of you.

sooooo much wood.

I moved so many logs from one spot to another today. boyohboy. my back is tired.

The best version of what i could imagine just happened.

Silver Screen.

I have just been starting every post with a song that has been in my head/on repeat on my ipod. Some of the words stick out to me and I am glad to have a place to reflect on the lyrics.

I really feel like the best thing I could imagine is happening to me right now. Last week a new artist from Finland came. Her name is Merja. She is so fun. We have such a good time together. I have always loved Finland for some reason so we talk a lot about it and she shows me pictures of her fashionable daughter who lives in Helsinki. She told me that she told her husband all about me, how happy and fun I am. ha. She is great company and for dinner the other night she made us meatballs just like Ikea. They were soooo good.

This week Richard and I are preparing the kiln site because next week we are firing the huge wood kiln. The kiln's name is Embla. It takes three days to fire. There are people coming from Sweden, Denmark and Norway to load and fire the kiln. We will just sign up on a schedule and take shifts through the night for 3 days. So Richard and I are cleaning up, preparing shelves and organizing wood.

I have also been casting more porcelain cups, glazing those I already bisqued and putting decals on the glazed ones. So far we have about 70 finished. I think they want a group of 150 before we take them to Slagelse Community to sell. I really enjoy the process of slip casting and decorating with decals, so I'm glad that job fell into my hands. I have a good time doing it.

Today I started making a landscape out of clay. Before, when I had my landscapes out of styrofoam everyone complained that they didn't mesh well with the sculptures. So I am making one out of a smooth, red, earthenware clay that they have here. It is sooooo smooth. I think I love it. Hopefully it looks good.

I am making dinner for everyone tonight. I made a lemon meringue pie for dessert and I am going to prepare a red curry for the main dish. So far I have made pizza, chicken-vegetable soup and tacos. That might be the end of my menu repertoire...(that's French for repertoire. See I told you I was practicing French!)

Fin.

Woweek number Two.

I listened to the new Vampire Weekend album a while ago, but never "heard" this song until today. And I love it. Give it a listen?
Giving Up The Gun.

Yesterday I finally figured out my flight home. My original ticket was for two months out, when I was going to travel around Europe for a month and end up visiting my parents in Romania. But then they offered me the assistant position for three months, so I needed to change my ticket. However, my departure date was too close to change, so I just took the flight, hoping to fix my return flight later from Copenhagen and skip visiting my parents all together.

When I called the travel office that helped me book it, they said that I had to go out of Romania and that it couldn't be changed (only to find out a day later it could be changed). So I made plans to leave here a week early and go to Romania anyway. It would be a shame to come all this way and not see my parents on their mission...plus I found a non-stop flight from Copenhagen to Bucharest--totally worth it.

I spoke with the director of the center here to make sure it was ok that I leave a week early and she said it was. She is very nice. We talked for a while and she asked me how things are going. I am really loving this place. During our conversation she told me three things that I am taking a huge compliments. First she mentioned that I could come back and that the more times I am here the easier it is to start making work and getting in the flow. Second she said that Richard, the studio manager who I work for, loves me! yes! I was hoping to be a good, hard worker and impress. And third she said I look European and that I fit right in. That made me feel great. Many people have told me that. Everyone starts speaking to me in Danish, and act really surprised when I answer back in English.
It feels good to be in a country where you fit it. I really love it here. Danish people are so friendly and funny. Their sense of humor is really great.

Art wise I have made 6 new sculptures. They are very cute. I will post pictures when I am finished with them. I hope to make at least 3 per week. This week I am ahead of the schedule and will start another one today.

Play is a child's work. So I'm not sure if I am a child or an adult, but I feel stuck/most satisfied in the world of play. Would you rather have more children acting like adults or more adults acting like children? Besides the tantrums, I choose the latter. I think the former makes me sad. Childhood is not a time to be forfeited. It is a time of discovery and imagination, where the world is open to possibility, where there are many questions with no need for answers, where creativity rules every action. Growing up is not my favorite. It's not that I hate responsibility and bills (although those aren't that great). It's just that I miss innocence and simplicity. If I were Miss America, I would definitely choose world peace and happiness for all.
Today, two women came into my studio and laughed with my sculptures. I put a smile on their faces. Good job me.

This is all reminding me of that documentary Promises
I love that movie.
Watch it.

Farvel.

best life ever.

This is the soundtrack for the best life ever.

I don't even know where to begin. My life is amazing. On Saturday I arrived in Copenhagen. I sat for a bit in the airport because I wasn't sure what to do and I was so tired. I decided to just take the train to Skaelskor, the town where I am staying, and explore Copenhagen another day. So I hopped the train, not knowing exactly where to sit or if I was on the right train. I eventually found my seat, but also found someone in my seat. I asked the woman if that was her seat and she moved immediately. Then I heard her talking to her friends in Spanish about she hadn't reserved a seat. They were from Spain so I began to speak Spanish with her. It was such a relief to be speaking a language that I knew.

On the flight over the whole plane was filled with Danish chatting. I sat next to a grad student who was going to study International Business for 3 weeks. He is from San Francisco and his mother is Swedish so he had been to Denmark a few times. We definitely felt like the minority.

No one from the office was in when I arrived at the center because it was a Saturday. But I met a few of the artists that were in the kitchen. Barbara and Pauline are from Germany (Pauline left today, Barbara leaves this next week), Sten is from Denmark, Anne is from France and Hikaru is from Japan. Today I met Richard and Katrine who work in the office. Katrine works two days a week and lives in Copenhagen. She writes music on her off time and has promised to take me to the smaller venues where I can see local bands play. oh so fun.

Today a new artist, Marc, arrived from France. He is 25 and seems very nice. I am glad he is staying for a month. So I am practicing my French as well as studying Danish. Anne and I are determined to learn.

I took a long walk today to the Thrift store. It smells the same here as it does in the states. I bought a hair dryer for my hair and also for the clay. Dual-purpose. Also I passed a bakery and stopped in to buy a true Danish. It was delicious.

oh baby joshua

We gotta believe it will all be alright in the end. If it's not alright yet, it's just because it's not the end yet. Don't sweat it.

miracle of miracles.

In February I applied for an "assistantship" at the Guldagergaard, an International Ceramic Research Center. I wanted to work for the summer in Denmark, assisting the artists who attend the center. However as the summer approached, I called and emailed the director and I found out they already had the positions filled for the summer, but that there might be a spot for the fall and I was the first on the waiting list. So I decided to take the fall semester off, just in case. I figured this opportunity was once in a lifetime.
Good news is that on June 30th they wrote me and told me there was a spot for Aug 1-31st. They understood it was late notice, but invited me. So that week I bought an airplane ticket and planned to travel around for a month after the assistantship because I had already taken the semester off.
However, I also emailed the director and asked if there was any way I could stay for longer. On July 15th she replied that she had rearranged the schedule and asked if I could stay for THREE MONTHS! I feel like my dreams are coming true!!!
Although I was so excited for this opportunity, I realized that none of my loans are coming through until the end of August and I have no money to be traveling around the world. I prayed and fasted and payed my tithing. I was constantly thinking about how I could work for the money I needed to make this trip happen, when it came to me to ask my professor. I have never asked for money from her before, but I called her and nervously asked if she could try and find some extra funds lying around the visual arts department at BYU.
A week later, she had found an internship fund!!! and they reimbursed the entire cost of my airplane ticket. I can't believe what a miracle it was. I am so blessed and I feel so lucky.
This week I am packing up and learning Danish. I'll be gone til November, I'll be gone til November, January, February, March, April, May, I see you crying but girl I can't stay.
thank you. Tak.

Cookie Heist

yesterday, feeling a little bit of a cookie hankering, I started pulling ingredients out of my cupboard. I don't have any good cookie recipes so I just decided to try to make one up. If it was possible to create a good cookie without measuring ANY ingredients and just throwing stuff into the mixing bowl, I would have pulled off the greatest cookie heist of all time.
I put in a couple scoops of butter, poured the rest of the brown sugar and some white sugar in and mixed. Then added some eggs and vanilla. I mixed together some pinches of baking soda and salt with a bowlful of flour and poured it into the wet mixture a little at a time, watching the consistency and adding oat bran and oatmeal and cinnamon. Then put in the chocolate chips. I put four down onto the cookie sheet and cooked them until they turned golden on the bottom.
They turned out to be the best cookies I have EVER made... using a secret recipe that even I will never figure out.

We'll always have pears.

Wowwee! Today was amazing. Emily and I both received monetary awards for our arts. We were planning on having a fun party up in Salt Lake at Kilby with two bands that we wanted to get to know, but it was canceled because of a snow storm in Wyoming that delayed their coming.
That can't get us down.
We went out for frozen yogurt and then to Emily's sister's house. We swam in the heated pool, casting shadows on the wall from the pool light. Then sitting in the hot tub we had so many good jokes and conversations and it turned into a wonderful evening. Then we went to Damien's and hung out with him and his roommates and made more good jokes and conversation.
Driving back, we were dancing and singing and feeling hungry so we stopped at In N Out and got a cheeseburger-split in two. Emily remembered that A Crowd of Small Adventures was opening for Camera Obscura in Las Vegas sometime soon and when we got home we found out it is the very same weekend we were planning on being in Vegas!! and the tickets are only $12!!! So we bought tickets!!
Then I tried calling Denmark again and finally got a hold of someone! PHEW. It was such a relief and a great end to the night.
I am grateful the universe looks out for me.

right!! a letter to myself.

I've been thinking a lot these past few days about my future. I have a lot of options, but I'm not sure what will make me the happiest. Two nights ago I was searching my inbox for an old email Susan sent me with an art jobs link and stumbled upon an old email I had written three years ago to an ex-boyfriend. I found a whole string of emails we had written to keep in touch and it was so fun to go through and read about the lives we led back then in 2007. I didn't even remember writing those emails, but they recounted my past and I loved reliving it.
As I read this particular email I was astounded by my own grace, wisdom and counsel. It shocked me because lately I have been feeling the exact same emotions and needed to hear those same words I expressed to him. Wow! I never would have imagined that my 25 year old self would be telling my 28 year old self how to change, trust, live and love. I was proud of myself back then, a little disappointed in my lack of faith now.
I didn't mean to write a letter to myself, but I'm glad it worked out that way.

jettisoning myself into youthdom/irresonsibility.

i went back in time last week. i dropped all my responsibilities and drove to austin, texas with 7 other people, all younger than me, all barely acquaintances. i may regret this on wednesday, when i have to give the single most difficult presentation i have ever prepared, but what has been done has been done. i was young and carefree. we drove 24 hours there and 24 back. we lounged, we laughed, swam and saw shows. nevermind, i don't think i will ever regret it. austin was amazing.

happy birthdays

I love receiving/sending packages for birthdays. I think my favorite part of receiving is when you pull the present out of the mail envelope and the once carefully curled ribbon has been smushed up against the present. There is something about that crushed curled ribbon, stuck in its place, kind of like a picture, frozen in time, saying, "This is exactly the way I looked when so-and-so placed me inside this envelope for you. And here's a hug."

you caved my karma in.

this has to be the most beautiful song in the whole world. I may or may not have listened to this one million times...with the potential for more.
Why do I love this?
no one knows.

poetry relief

In my quest to appreciate, understand and love the wind I wrote an haiku and dedicate it to that moving force:

Wind's Curling Breath
it swishes past me
lifting my skirts and spirits
changing old for new






photo courtesy of this blog

Patriotism.

If you fill your life with enough olympics you will never be sad that your two best friends are on the other side of the world.
Because the olympics brings pillow fights, banana pancake cookies, blueberries, impromptu dance parties, art, dog piles and the spirit of Mardi Gras.
go.U.S.A.
(let's pretend that that's what my shirt really says.)

Accordion-oh-no? oh yes.

probably the single best thing that has happened to me since yesterday.

To everything there is a season.

This week, when needing to console a grieving friend, I found this poem by Emily Dickinson that said exactly the right words, in just the right way. I love this. I love Emilys.

"Our share of night to bear,
Our share of morning,
Our blank in bliss to fill,
Our blank in scorning.

Here a star, and there a star,
Some lose their way.
Here a mist, and there a mist,
Afterwards—day!"

I'm Excited

My show opens on Friday! It's a collection of my R.E.C.E.N.T. Works (Rachel's Emotional Comical Electronic Nostalgic Things). They are all over the gallery, ready for blast off and good conversation.