L.O.V.E.

I'm in true love with this bike.

so cheap, so light weight, so beautiful. come to me. puhlease.

Emotional Bag Check

The internet was made to connect us and sometimes I feel like it is such a negative, disconnecting force in our lives. Today, I found a website (forwarded to me by Good magazine, which is really soooo goood!) that is called Emotional Bag Check. CHECK IT OUT.
I always listen to and analyze the lyrics of songs. They sooth my soul.
I carried some random people's emotional bags today. I wrote strangers personal letters to heal their breaking hearts. I teared up as I told one person that they should remember to love themselves, just like Mark Kozelek says in "Have You Forgotten."
I applaud whoever made this website. I love the inherent good in all of us.

the humidity feels like swimming.

However, still less humid than yesterday. P.H.E.W.



I post the 2nd edition of bedtime boredom. Enjoy.

I have a lot of great projects in the works here in Worcester. I am applying for a grant from the Massachusetts Arts Council for an art project that I am developing with Girls Inc. Girls Inc. is like Girls and Boys Club, but only for Girls. I found out about their organization because, actually, I live next door. A few weeks ago, I thought of this project and walked next door and proposed it. They were so excited and kept saying they could have never imagined such a wonderful opportunity to walk through the door. I told them I would get the grant and also that I wanted to volunteer in other capacities and they have put me right to work.

They are in the process of updating their Science and Technology program and have a new room dedicated especially for those subjects. They were thinking about painting a solar system on the wall and since I love outer space so much they asked if I would paint the mural. I said, "Of, course." But also suggested they could be more abstract by just painting, for example, the rings of Saturn? A couple of years ago I had seen this picture of the rings and thought it was incredible.


So today I started drawing out all the lines and painting dark purple universe on the other walls. Every day this week I will go in and work on the mural and I hope to finish it by the end of the week. I forgot to take pictures today, but promise to not be so forgetful in days to come. I'm really grateful for the experience and the opportunity I have to share my talents to bless the lives of others in my community.

Sometimes I eat so much candy I feel sick.

Peter (my studiomate and fellow artist in residence) and I went to the movies the other night. It was his first time sneaking in popcorn. I was shocked. I really wonder how he made it through college without that experience. Since I'm an old hand, I showed him the ropes.
We went to Target and got the Popcorn/Soda combo and soooo much candy. Luckily he had a big bag and I stuffed everything in there and walked gingerly through the doors. We went to see Midnight in Paris. I usually am not that taken with Woody Allen films, but this one I adored. It helps that Paris, in my opinion, is the most beautiful city in the world. We found a cheap theater in West Boylston. It was only $5 for the movie at night and $3 on Tuesdays. We decided that would be our movie theater. Its only 10 minutes away from Worcester and they show pretty new movies there. Cool, right?

Yesterday I taught my first workshop at the Center. It was called "Howling Clay" and was a hand-building workshop on making hollow bodied animals. Three people signed up, but only two were able to make it. I was happy to have so few, because it was my first time teaching there and I still feel a little out of place. I was running around trying to find tools and necessities the whole time. One woman made her cat and the other woman made an owl. We worked for 4 hours together and I think the animals turned out pretty well for two people who had never worked in clay before.

After the workshop I went to the RS general broadcast. The ward here in Worcester had a dinner beforehand where we switched seats every course and were able to talk to a lot of people. I met two woman from Central America and we became friends. They are in the family ward that I am zoned for. One of them is from El Salvador and her friend (from Guatemala) told me she makes the best pupusas ever! I think I need to be the judge of that. I told them I was dying to eat pupusas and we decided to get together on Oct 8th to have a pupusa party! I really can't wait. Besides all my friends and family, El Mexsal is top on my list of things I miss.

bedtime boredom/a new(old) hobby

So I used to play the guitar constantly (about 10-15 years ago), but when I moved out east I didn't even think about bringing my guitar. I mean, it had been at least a year since I even picked one up (I lie). However, there was only so much valuable cargo space in my car for the drive and I figured I wouldn't want or need one.
But the first week I was here I suddenly had this urge/craving to play guitar. I knew it was a constant that I needed to calm my nerves and let me release from all the unfamiliar activities that filled my time.
Luckily, I found out this week that my roommate has a guitar! It was just tucked in her closet collecting dust. So I asked to borrow it and have been singing and playing like I was a sophomore in college again.
My new favorite thing is to put on my pajamas, wash off all my make-up, brush my teeth and record myself playing songs. Its like I'm playing a podcast lullaby--now if I was only brave enough to post this somewhere people actually look! ha. Enjoy this little folk song and goodnight!

WHOAman.

The world has enough women who are tough;
we need women who are tender.
There are enough women who are coarse;
we need women who are kind.
There are enough women who are rude;
we need women who are refined.
We have enough women of fame and fortune;
we need more women of faith.
We have enough greed;
we need more goodness.
We have enough vanity;
we need more virtue.
We have enough popularity;
we need more purity.

-Margaret D. Nadauld (Young Women General President)

my new hampshire adventure

Camping was amazing. New Hampshire is beautiful and we spent the time getting to know one another through kayaking, swimming in the lake, yoga, pretend cafe rio salads and service projects. Everyone I spoke with was smart and interesting. All their stories were wonderful and their vocabulary astounding. My most memorable experience* was sitting on the dock, talking with friends about how I wish I always could love and how it is so hard to be vulnerable. We are constantly fighting that feeling of insecurity. Today one of those friends passed on this amazing video.




I hope we can all be kinder and gentler to ourselves and those around us. Namaste.


*Another memorable experience--a person I barely know paid me a most thoughtful compliment. I was so impressed with the sincerity, honesty and openness with which it was shared. I admire those qualities and hope that I can be more open with compliments, generous with praise and more loving to all those I meet on a daily basis. Let's love and uplift without thinking of the consequences, having gratitude for the opportunity we have to live and feel vulnerable. I'm srsly embracing the hell out of this.

toll road romance

On sunday, the man in the toll booth told me the charge and as I handed him my money he said, "Can I ask you how old you are?" I smiled and said, "Sure. 29!"
He was shocked. He said, "I was thinking, 'She could be 18 or 25.' but anyway, you're beautiful."
That made my day, although he still made me pay the toll.

Lesson learned: Good looks aren't as persuasive as cold hard cash.

Everyone around here thinks I am super young. Peter said it's my youthful skin. Last week, we were at an Art Council meeting talking to one of the board members. He kept referring to "our" generation (pointing to Peter and I) like he was a lot older than me. I am 5 years older than Peter and don't really feel like I am in his generation. I laughed at the man's comments and asked him how old he was and told him that I was older than Peter. Turns out I am also older than that man...by a month. We are both 29. ha.

C'est Ma Vie!

Saturday I found myself meeting new people at a Temple Conference in Belmont, MA. I went with a girl I had met at church the week before, Alyssa. We casually talked with different groups, but at lunch we sat with some other people I had met that week at institute and formed some great friendships. After we had split up to go to different workshops (One of my friends left to go to the homework workshop at her house) I received a text from her saying she didn't go do homework, but instead was going apple picking at Shelburne Farm in Stow, MA.
We decided to head up there after learning how to index. It was a beautiful farm with a huge apple orchard. We bought a bag (peck size) and strolled around the orchard with our friends, making jokes, climbing on shoulders to reach the highest Galas in the tree and eating apples until our stomachs felt sick.
Afterward, Jeremiah bought all 6 of us girls ice cream. They had a bunch of specialty flavors designed just for their farm and we sat at a picnic table enjoying the commencement of fall and friendships.
As everyone went their separate ways, Jeremiah, Alyssa and I lingered and talked at the farm. We found out that he lived with his Grandma and that she had a private little lake house where they always went swimming. I asked if we could go swimming right then! And he said YES. So we drove back to Worcester and got swimsuits from my place then headed out to Asnacomet Pond.
We followed him as he took us deeper and deeper into the woods and then on a little dirt path that lead down to a private dock with two little huts. One had a kitchen and a table and the other housed life jackets and kayak paddles. We jumped into 3 kayaks and went around the lake, scouring the tree filled edge looking for blueberries. The water was perfectly still and crystal clear and the forest filled my ears as the sun set over the lake. It was so peaceful and perfect. I couldn't stop smiling. With a full moon we could see clearly across the whole lake and we headed back to our dock. The water was surprisingly warmer than the air outside and right after hooking up our boats we jumped in and swam around for a bit.
The next door neighbors have a floating dock with a 10 foot tower built on it. So we climbed up and jumped into the water a few times. From the top of the tower you can look over the still lake and see an amazing reflection of the moon on the water. All night I was blessing my good fortune in meeting the folks that I met that day.


I'm really loving this location and having a wonderful time in New England. This weekend: Camping in New Hampshire. I'm sure it will be just as pleasant.

Moving to the east coast: Never thought I'd do it.

So it's official. I am moving to Worcester, MA at the end of August. Wowzas.
I called the bishop of the area, talked to his wife and she gave my number to a woman living out there who goes to med school. She called me a few weeks ago and we talked. I asked her if she would want a roommate and turns out she'd been looking for a way to save money, so for the past few weeks I have been sending her emails with housing listings and she would go check them out. This week she found us a place to live. Yesterday she sealed the deal with the new landlord. Here's what I have to look forward too:


















an attic apartment in this triple decker Worcester original. Not too much space, but the neighborhood is great and the rent is cheap. Woot. Srsly--come visit me in Mass.


UPDATE! this apartment fell through. so sad. So I am back to square 1, searching for a place to sleep at night. I'm sure it will all work out.

yogi training

When I was a freshman in college my sisters and I took a community yoga class offered at BYU. We went every Tues/Thurs for the whole year. On the side Andrea and I would do Bryan Kest's Power Yoga video and that year began my love for yoga. Which has just barely blossomed (just like the lotus flower) into a semi-obsession.



In May I started taking a yoga class twice a week from Kim at the Orem Fitness Center. It was different/better than any other yoga class I have ever taken. She told me it is called Anusara Yoga (read this definition of Anusara yoga:

Anusara (a-nu- sar -a), means “flowing with Grace,” “going with the flow,” “following your heart.” Founded by John Friend in 1997, Anusara Yoga is a hatha yoga posture system that unifies a Tantric philosophy of intrinsic Goodness with Universal Principles of Alignment™. Anusara incorporates a "celebration of the heart," philosophy that looks for the good in all people and all things, and uses precise physical alignments to open the heart physically (an open heart is part of all yoga traditions but in the western world this focus is often lost and John Friend has re-emphasized it).

Don't you want to do it too?!?) and she personally includes rapid eye treatments and Kundalini meditation. It is amazing! I feel sad whenever I miss a class, wish the classes were longer, and hope that one day Kim produces a DVD with all her varying classes. She focuses on a different Chakra every month, giving us the essential oil that accompanies that chakra and teaching us all about the power we hold within ourselves as we open up to the energy and life force and release fear. I'm so into this right now and could talk 'yoga' for hours.

If I am every in Orem on a Tues/Thurs at 10am you know where to find me.

one may's work: the wedding dress

I finished Bryn's wedding dress and she put it to the test. She's married now and it worked out fine. Here's some photos of me with my friend and our creation. Congrats to Bryn and Jesus.

i can't say stop

Its impossible to say, "No" to good Swede pop. Enjoy.

story(grand)slam

Tonight I went to a StorySlam. It is an event that my friend Laura invented. She gives a theme and people show up ready to tell and listen to stories. I decided to just go and be an audience member, but my friend Madison kept suggesting that I tell a story. The theme of the StorySlam was "Shot through the heart: stories of beaus and arrows."
I'll admit to having my fair share of heart breaking stories--so finally I decided to tell the story of a younger me who never shared what I felt with the guy I was in love with and obviously, he broke my heart. It was a true shot to the heart.
Lo, and behold, I WON! My story won the slam. I never expected that kind of success, but it felt good to walk away a winner. In August, all the winners from the previous Slams will have to tell another story to see who wins grand prize. Let's cross our fingers and hope something crazy happens to me between now and then, so I have something to tell.




Here's a photo of me with my winning certification.

oh no, snow.

If I lay here long enough
still
the softly falling snow will create a casket around me
filling in each crevice
making my cocoon
an envelope of stillness
cold cold white.

Houston, we've had a problem.

Here I am at the Houston Hobby airport waiting to get on a standby flight to Las Vegas. We were supposed to be in and out of here, but our original flight was canceled, we rebooked, then when we checked into the airport this morning at Tampa we found out our connecting flight from Houston to Vegas was canceled too!! The only available flight was at 9:25pm, so we booked that and headed to Houston. We've been here for 4 hours and hope to get onto a flight at 6:35...but we'll see. Cross fingers.
Otherwise we'll be waiting for 3 more hours and I'll have nothing to do BUT homework. I'm not ready for spring break to end, but I'm also not ready to set up a home in Houston*.


*one bonus was going to lunch with Lauren. She picked us up from the airport and we hung out for a couple of hours.

What good is it to sing helplessness blues?

My trip out to Denver this weekend was wonderful. I had my interview on Saturday and I am wondering if I even want that job. So I may be back at the beginning of my search for "what do I do when I graduate?"

All I really can do it listen to this song, over and over.

my own time young

This past weekend, amidst the anxiety of finishing all the work for my final show, I decided to go to San Francisco. My friends were all going and there was space in the car for one more. We left Thursday and drove through the night, slept a few hours and then headed out to explore. I spent most of my time with Susan and Jesse. I haven't seen them in a year and they took me to a lot of wonderful new places in and out of the city.
We drove through the countryside, ate cheese by a duck pond, went to the old bath house (by the Cliff House) and the Musee Mechanique.
Susan loaned me her camera and I captured our whole adventure in hipstamatic style. Thanks for the great weekend!

just wondering

I can't stay in one place longer then a year. When did I become such a nomad?

Standing For Something

I am finally getting around to reading Pres. Hinckley's book. I couldn't even get through the first page without wanting to blog about it. Here's the first sentence, "Love is the only force that can erase the differences between people or bridge the chasms of bitterness." WoW! That's exactly what we need.
I really miss that man.